


Am I a bad child?

by SleepyUmbllera



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Kid Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), King Eret (Video Blogging RPF), Major Character Injury, Manberg Festival on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Sad Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), They/Them Pronouns for Eret (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 19:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29531361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleepyUmbllera/pseuds/SleepyUmbllera
Summary: Dream just don't understand
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Eret (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & Phil Watson
Comments: 15
Kudos: 228





	1. Chapter 1

Dream could only cry and scream as he tried to endure the pain, killing him every single one of his weak bodies as the destruction on the server became bigger and bigger. No one wants to stop their own war as if it's something that they need in their life.

When will the pain go? When will everything be back to normal?

"Where's George? Where's Sapnap? Where are Dream best friends?" His child still questions even at this stage, trying to call his best friends.

He remembered it very clearly, at first it was just three people on the server. George, Sapnap, and Little Dream. Building the community house together, playing tag with the little one, and playing with their pets. They were so happy for being together as a friend, 

as the dream team

After little Dream invites more people, it's change upside down very quickly

Many nations were built by the people to cover up their crimes. Now people want power over the server land, killing people to take stuff and threatening others, attempting to use 'war' as their united language just to gain pride and greed over something they want to control and cover it up as the sign of 'justice' for a prospective nation....

....not realizing it that the young admin who was barely teenage, little Dream screaming for people to hear him even for a bit to stop, screaming for help, even apologies for whatever actions he caused just to stop this overwhelming war.

Now the admin has to suffer for his punishment for not keeping his land safe from wars over and over.

He tightens his grin over his pillow to his head, tries to gain sort of comfort for his internal pain he can't even stop, doesn't care whatever his bed is now socked with stink pure crimson all over. His body is now covered in scars that didn't get healed property from the people and pets who were left killed by the other, even from this second, there will be new scars added to his body. 

He hides it as if it's nothing (it's very hurt, help me pls) for him

As if it's not enough for him to suffer, some part of his body has a few marks like a thunder clash into him as the reminder for him not being able to stop them from building nations, factions, and armies of their corruption. 

And lastly his face, stain of black tears could be seen for how long he was crying as he still continued to cry for the sake of his pain. His throat and mouth we're sore from the moment he threw up a lot of blood. 

He wipes his mouth and washed his teary face, cover it with his porcelain white mask with a drawn smiley face

Moving from the place where the little Dream treehouse, a small room with a few sign up on the wall with a written national anthem of one county, the L'manburg.

"Will, don't do this..." One man with raven wings attached to his back like a cloak, trying to stop the man with a leather jacket as he wanted to press the button in front of him. The silent consumed the room, he turn around to see him before he even-

"....you know what the traitor said, Phil. It was never meant to be"

He pressed it.

From that moment, Dream doesn't care about his friends, his family, or his land for once. He screamed as loud making his throat hurt even more, ignoring the blood of his body flowing more than it used to be, tears that he was drowning him inside finally released from his eyes. He can't keep up anymore.

What a poor child who has this kind of faith...  
A child who just wants to play...  
A child that wants peace he could never have grabbed....  
A child who was never meant to grow up soon before anyone...

Before Dream collapsed on the bed, his mind speak him a question that always stuck with him from the moment war started,

"Am I a bad child?"


	2. suck it or leave it?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream understand now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello its me again.  
> I want to say thank you very much for anyone who enjoy this oneshot! because of the huge support from my friends and you all I decided to add two more chapters for this book.
> 
> again, thank you and enjoy reading this chapter.

….

It was silent in the room, there is no one after all in the small room except Dream who painfully tries to walk or move, likely dragging his body into the wooden cabinet beside his bed. No more screaming from him for his throat feels hurt and burned, no more crying as his swollen eyes began to show tired from his current stage, his clothes soaked with his blood making his movement seem heavier, he might as well just let him sleep on the floor and forget everything. Imagining that makes himself feel slightly better.

Sadly his fate was never in his side, he will and surely feel them again. He'll be damned if he can't fix himself at that moment.

Finally, he reached out to the cabinet and opened it. Inside, there are five bottles of regeneration potions shining bright with pink, purple and yellowish colored blend in together harmony ready for him in case he needed them, which is now the perfect time apparent. 

He pulled out one bottle.

He opened it, took off the cap and threw it carelessly. 

He looked at the liquid inside of the bottle as it danced freely in that small space. very delicate for anyone who seeks this potion, not that its rare and hard to find it... 

...it's more for their fast regeneration reaction to anyone who consumes it. it is quite pricey if you purchase it so he learns how to brew it, all the five potions are the result of his hard work.

Dream however, hesitates at first. His memories may be blurred but he still remembers when he drank the potion at one tournament he participated, he had to get bedridden for a few days after because of too many of the potions he took including the one he brewed with the wrong ingredient. his stomach feels horrible now even after he overcomes his sickness, the headache of having your skin burning inside still giving the chills for remembering it. but…

“it’ll heal me even if tomorrow will be hell for me,”

he sight and took a bit from the potion.

He felt his body begin to warm up from the liquid he drank. He felt as he was getting held by someone with warm hands, making him have a sense of safety. But alas, everything must come to an end after the effect is gone. He looks down to his bottle, he still has half way through…

Is he making the right decision? his thought swayed quickly as he drank it all up. He gave up on his senses now. 

“it's better this way after all… ” 

he let himself be broken, as the time seems to freeze in the room until… 

it's empty, and he wants more. He tossed the bottle and took another one from the cabinet, he opened it and drank it immediately. He began to laugh as he spoke utter nonsense into the room. 

he talk to himself in his desperate stage,

“Why do I care so much in the first place?”

“all he did was give them three simple rules, is not that hard to follow!”

“to my surprise, it is harder to just have a good life together than having nonstop wars.” 

“what are they gaining from all the stupid wars? nothing! it was just a loss for both parties.” 

“was it worth it for all the people who joined in? Is it worth it for all the animals we befriend and bound to keep it, now just be sacrificed? Is it even worth it to call us ‘one big happy family’ ? oh yes we all know the answer: NO IT NEVER WAS!” 

he threw his third bottle to the wall making it shattered to the ground, as he was about to take another bottle he saw his reflection on one or two pieces from the broken bottle.

oh he looks horrible, looking the same as before with his skin starting to have a shade of red in his cheek from his tears...or from the potion he drank a few times. 

well that means he has to study the potions again. yay

damn it, i was about to drink the last one… 

ah, now that he remembers. Jschaltt, the ram hybrid who is now a president of man’burg. back when he was leaning on the tree, eating his apples alone. out of nowhere that man showed up to his face as he was watching him closely.

that man has so much time on his hands somehow. 

the man was scary at first, jschallt was holding his bottle of whiskey as usual and sat beside him? no greeting or even talking, they just sat there and enjoyed one another company, in the awkward way.

Soon they opened up with each other. starting with simple greetings following with the old ram, eventually they talk about their life, complains and throwing insult the more they meet up in the tree all day long, play with the flowers, rocks, bottles he found until the moon rise up to the surface (before the old ram passed out from drunk or Quackity and Tubbo has to dragged him for work, mostly Tubbo tho).

For a long time, he felt like a child again, playing and having fun in his land.

like the old time...

Of course, Jschaltt has to leave for the festival, Dream has understood his situation, his role as the president is more important than being a friend to one lowly kid. He couldn't come to the festival as he was dealing with his condition. The day before the festival is the last day for their little meetup.

“Well kid it was fun and all, but I gotta go now y’know with all the president stuff and the festival.” he said, ruffling Dream dirty blond hair. 

“whatever…”

“I'll give you a word in advance. If you ever feel lonely and pathetic just suck it or leave it, suck it if you want to maintain your condition or leave it to be damned and make a new story kid.” 

“I...don't understand? what do you mean-”

“you'll understand it when you get older. Anyway, bye don’t miss me.” he waved him a goodbye and walked away from the boy. 

“...w-will you come back to play with me old man?” he asked, looking up at the man's face who glanced at his back showing a sight of attention.

“don't know, and don't get your hopes way too high.” He went back to his work.   
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
He opened his eyes, looked around the room as he went back to his senses. He went back again in his tiny room, holding his fourth bottle ready to be served. 

He's here again, alone.

He understands every word that jschaltt said to him, it all makes sense now. Jschaltt was never going to tell him even if he begged him. that old man never cared about his feelings in the first place right? so why now...

will he be scared to knew the truth? he was already ruined in the first place!

“...y’know Jschaltt, when you said that I will understand when I get older…”

to think that the world would be merciful for everyone...

“...you going to understand it eventually, sooner or later” 

...it's just a lie to get away from the harsh reality, the world itself. 

the door opened up forcefully as someone entered his treehouse.  
.  
.  
.  
“D-Dream…? buddy?” 

he looked to the person in front of him. his eyes opened wide as his bottle plashing to the ground and shattering around the floor.

“E..re..t?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part 3?  
> (jkjk im still working on it)


End file.
